On vacation alone: when and how?

You participate in organized activities, you learn to respect times and deliveries, you play and maybe even get bored. Playing and getting bored are two necessities!

In the moment of choosing the holiday and the place, it is good that the parents ascertain what is the organization of the day proposed to the children. Programs too tight can be a bit risky: so many interesting activities are certainly a good thing, but space must also be left for play and relaxation, otherwise…what holiday is it? On vacation, their interests are accommodated: with the little ones it is better to prefer holidays with “known groups” and even habitually frequented, with the older ones – used to being in a group and socializing – it is essential to support their interests (reading science, theater, foreign languages).

Each child has his own modality and ability to adaptively explore new situations: there are more exploratory children and able to manage well the difficulties that a holiday alone entails and who, instead, proceeds in a somewhat more uncertain manner.

Every child misses his parent, but everyone has their own way of activating their inner resources to deal with this discomfort. Physiologically, human beings (as well as all mammals) are programmed to experience separation anxiety. In the child this appears around nine months, when one begins to explore moving (e.g. crawling). Then the separation anxiety slowly returns, but it can reappear at the moment of detachment, such as the entrance to school or, in fact, a holiday in autonomy.

If the children ask to come back, it is important that the adult maintains control and asks for help from the educator of reference, who can tell us whether the need is real and effective or not.

Sometimes the child shows a strong discomfort only when he talks to the parent, but during the day he is serene and easily distractible. It can be useful to give him some time and see how the situation evolves. However, if the quality of sleep, appetite and daytime serenity are less, the educator himself will tell us to go and get him.